Preparing for your children

I recently took my son on a canoeing trip with some other dads and their sons on the Namekagon River in Wisconsin.

I have been deliberate about helping my son along his journey to manhood. One book that has been helpful in my teaching is "Boyhood and Beyond" by Bob Schultz.

According to the book, Schultz recommends that boys start to think in their teenage years about what they want their kids to be like. Schultz learned this from God when asking what to teach his daughter:

On January 11, 1978, God gave us our first child. That evening my wife went to bed early. Our daughter Molly lay beside me on the couch. I watched her like any new dad would, thoroughly amazed that she belonged to me. I knew that I was responsible for her life. She was under my care, to protect, to provide for, and to train. Never having children before, I felt somewhat overwhelmed. 'What will become of her life?' I wondered. I purposed at that moment to plan her education.

I picked up my Bible. Beginning in Proverbs, I read, looking for things to teach her. After an hour I was getting nowhere. I couldn't put my random thoughts into any sort of plan. 'God,' I asked, 'what do I teach my daughter?'

He gently answered in my heart, 'Be what you want her to be.' I didn't expect that answer. I was thinking about molding her; God was thinking about molding me. 'She will be what you are, not what you try to teach her.'

In general, children act the way that their parents act. They follow their parents' example. It's never too early to think about the example that you want to make for your children, as that will influence their children and beyond.

Conflict at a wedding reception

Weddings can be glorious and exciting. Marriage, however, can be downright difficult. On p. 195 of "Wild at Heart," John Eldredge shares how both he and his wife felt hurt and disappointment resurface while at a friend's wedding reception. Rather than succumb to Satan's attack, John prayed about his marriage:

Slowly, almost imperceptibly, the wave began to lift. My thoughts and emotions quieted down to a more normal size. Clarity was returning. The campfire was just a campfire again. Jesus, you know the pain and disappointment in my heart. What would you have me do? (The bar was no longer an option, but I was still planning to just go straight to my room for the rest of the night.) I want you to go back in there and ask your wife to dance. I knew he was right; I knew that somewhere down deep inside that's what my true heart would want to do. But the desire still seemed so far away. I lingered for five more minutes, hoping he had another option for me. He remained silent, but the assault was over and the bonfire was only embers. Once more I knew the man I wanted to be.

John went back to the wedding reception and asked his wife to dance. They had a glorious -- and exciting -- evening.